Facilitation function for MS. Semmangudi to garland and put salwar. As always in his inimitable humorous style he turned to the audience and asked for their opinion for his garlanding MS. The crowd overwhelming conveyed it is okay for him to do so. Then he said, you have given consent, but what about Sadasivam ? To this Sadasivam instatntly said “besha” (definitely).” Now , I need have my wife’s view as I will have to face her after the function ?” quickly quipped Semmangudi. His wife, visibly blushing, communicated “yes” by wave of her hand typical of Housewives (those days !). But Semmangudi won’t leave it at that and asked “ What about MS ?” To this MS also indicated acceptance by a ever slight nod of her head. Audience has approved. Sadasivam has given his consent. My wife has given the permission. MS has also authorized. Still “something” makes me hesitate. So I request Sadasivam to come to the dais and garland MS.
Now what is that “ something” that Semmangudi referred as coming in between? It is the “parampara” – the tradition, culture, one’s own consciousness - whatever you call it. Now the point is not whether it is right or wrong for a man to garland a woman. It is for each individuals to introspect and decide. But there are certain traditions which are better followed and others which can be broken. For example it is in Indian (not just Hindu) tradition that a father never physically comes close to his own daughter after she grows to certain age. And like wise for a mother not to be too close to a grown son. May be certain other societies do not approve of such restrictions. But it is a fact that divorce is high among persons who have been brought up with close attention even after their growth by their parents.
As narrated by Suki Sivam in a TV show on 23.1.2011 from a conversation his father had told him when he was a boy.
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