Each
of us want peace and happiness in life. Still, happiness often evades us. “Is
there a simple, straightforward roadmap to get happiness and peace in life”.
“There is.” Says Swami Paramarthanandaji ‘Reducing PORT is the best way’. PORT
stands for Possessions, Obligatory Duties, Relationships and Transactions. How
to reduce these?
Happiness
is a state of mind; it does not come from possessions alone. There are severe
limitations of happiness sought in objects. First, deep effort and some pain
are involved in acquiring objects. Many waste their entire life in pursuit of
desirable objects. There is no guarantee that even after getting those objects
or positions, you would be happy. You may feel ‘let-down’ after putting
in so much of effort. You may think, ‘this is not what I laboured for’.
Also, objects of desire keep changing, and so also our goal posts. The
chase continues and every new possession brings with it own burden. If
someone has a house with swimming pool and ten bedrooms; imagine his plight in
maintaining it. He is busy all the time cleaning, fixing, protecting. Does the
house serve us, or do we serve the house? Again, objects make us dependent on
them. For instance, once we are used to certain objects, a particular style/standard
of living, it is very difficult live without those objects or changed life
style/standard. Hence all possessions usually create bondage.
Relationships
are meant to make our life happy. But do they? We have to maintain some blood
relations for social cohesion, but we create other new relationships, which
complicates life. Every new relationship has to be maintained. You have to
remember to wish people on their birthdays and anniversaries, participate in
functions like marriage and engagement, or reach out in case of sickness or
loss. Also you become sad or experience pain when the person with whom you have
a relationship does not reciprocate. It is said that grief is never caused by
outsiders or unknown people. It is caused by people with whom you have a
relationship. Depending on your attitude, your relationships might cause you
more pain than pleasure.
Every
possession and every new relationship creates its own obligatory duties. You
have to insure your vehicles, for example, remember to send it for regular
service. Similarly we have to attend to the expectations of relationships.
These add to our list of obligatory duties. We cannot avoid basic, minimum
obligatory duties towards the office, business, parents, spouse or children.
But our optional duties also become obligatory when you maintain too many
possessions and relationships. We should also be careful in accepting new roles
in life just for the sake of ego-satisfaction. If you are made President or
Secretary of a Society, you may feel good, but that adds to your obligatory
duties also.
Performance
of each of these duties involves a number of transactions. Thus any additional
relationship increases duties & responsibilities and increased
transactions. But trying to cope with large number of transactions usually
brings in pressure on one’s time leaving no time to be happy!
This
is not to say that you should have no objects or relationships in your life.
There is no problem as long as you can manage them. It is ok as long as
you are aware of their limitations and are able strike a balance in life. But
the moment the increased possessions and relationships upsets the mind, peace
and happiness will be lost. Life will be peaceful only if you are able to
discriminate between what is necessary and what is unnecessary in your life. That
is the PORT of call for happiness.
